T Minus 18: Are You Waiting for Your Kids to Grow Up?

Just wait until your kids get older.

It’s what we middle-aged parents hear a lot of times.

When I say “middle-aged” I don’t really mean our age, but our kids age. You know the stage where you’ve gotten past the preschool years but you’re not quite in the teen age years yet? For older kids they call it the tween years, most of us call it the elementary stage or the middle stage.

But no matter what stage it is… It’s not the life-pause stage.

My daughter, whom we affectionately refer to as 'Bug',  at age three.

My daughter, whom we affectionately refer to as ‘Bug’, at age three.

When my kids were toddlers, we had nap time. It was my most treasured time of the day. I would hold them close and tucked them in and even read a book or two, then while they rested for the afternoon I went to work. Sure, I threw in a load of laundry, picked up a few toys in the middle of my path through the house. However, for that hour or two in the afternoon, I’d pulled out a paper and a pen or my computer if I was able, and I’d write.

“But your so young! You still have plenty of time.”

My parents taught me if you wanted something in life you have to work for it. Sitting around and waiting for my kids to grow up is like leaving a garden untended for eighteen years and then coming back and trying to remember where you planted the red peppers.

If I were you, I wouldn’t eat those red peppers, like everything else that grows old and gets left behind, they’ve shriveled up and turned bitter. Not that aging has ever been a bad thing. Look at some of the greatest wines, they’re better when they’re decade or two old, and sometimes a century.

I don’t believe we were created to be like wine.

The impression I’ve gotten over the years is that you have to wait for your kids to grow up in order to accomplish your dreams or have success in your life.

Especially if your a woman.

Apparently, when you have kids, your life becomes a count down for your aspirations in life. Long ago, someone wrote this invisible code that said you had to pull out a hat box and fill it with all your dreams and that one desire. Then it gets sealed up and locked away until the last kid is eighteen.

I’m afraid I didn’t get that memo or it got lost in the mail. Maybe it’s festering in my spam box, do you think? Either way, motherhood hasn’t stopped me from pursuing dreams and doing what I love, and neither should it you.

My kids love that I share my hopes and dreams with them. They get so excited when they can  share ideas on a story I’m writing and then have me read to them bits and pieces of it before bed. This past week, my son surveyed his class and gave me a list of possible titles for my free ebook that is now available for download from here on my site. By sharing the things we love, demonstrating the effort and the desire to achieve something, you’re doing your kids a much bigger favor than kicking your dreams under the bed. No one ever said you couldn’t be a parent and work towards that goal or dream.

Like my kids, you may find your family is there to support and encouragement to carry you on your journey.

Don’t wait for your kids to grow up. If you do, you may find they’ve shriveled up or the hat box isn’t there anymore.

Is there something in your life that you’ve put on hold?



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2 thoughts on “T Minus 18: Are You Waiting for Your Kids to Grow Up?

  1. Jackie Yeager

    You are so right! My kids have experienced all my ups and downs in my quest to become a published author. It’s important for them to see me working hard to reach my dream. And when I finally achieve it, the celebration will be special for them too! 🙂


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